Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Almost 9 months & day after Xmas

So its 5am now, you woke up ate and fell back asleep, I put you in my bed ( that's where I usually nurse you at night) and now as I'm curled up with you as im kissing your forehead and your little hands, & smelling your hair ( babies smell so good!) and I couldn't stop thinking about how crazy it is, just this whole having a baby.
Not in a way like " oh wow we have a baby" but laying here looking at you I just find it so crazy that " we" or " I" created this little human- I mean to really think about it blows my mind.
It's such a strange surreal but amazing feeling.
It puts a whole new perspective on your own humanity.
I think anyone reading this,that is a parent at one point or other for sure has laid with their child and thought
" holy crap, we created you, your my mini me,"
I knew nothing of you a year ago and now I couldn't imagine life without u, I mean really.
Not sure at what point each person has that realization but I'm sure of it that everyone does.
Haha especial laying here in the middle of the night with nothing but your thoughts, you really think deeply in it.
It feels like your an extension of me, almost how you would look at your arm or leg. But this is still while you are sleeping, once you wake and I start seeing a little personality and all the different ways you react and act, that blows my mind more. It's totally your own, at almost nine months you have a personality that is becoming more clear with each day. So this little extension of me has its own mind and soul that is different that mine.
I could go more into but I probably should go back to sleep before your up again.
I haven't written in a while, your walking so much now that its harder to sit you in one place and do anything.
Your very active and love to be moving non stop, so yes walking while holding my fingers is your absolute favorite. Pretty much no matter what, if your fussy, hungry, or tired, if I set you down on the floor and give you my fingers to hold, & start walking with with you, you instantly become happy .
So with that being said WE WALk ALOT ;) ALL DAY EVERY DAy! Haha
Every day is exciting with you, I mean it really is. I love seeing you change and develop day by day I'm front of my eyes.
Iv had to cut back on work more since you are a busy job of mine, but I'm ok with it, I figure work will always be there but watching you change and grow won't.
You are still with me 24/7 and Although i defiantly need breaks here n there and ok sometimes more then just "hear n there" but I wouldn't and don't wanna change any of it.
And again I'm lucky enough to where I can cut back on work and we are ok cause otherwise I honestly would not know what to do.
It's all good :) I do plan on getting your grandparents to watch you a bit after the holidays are over so I could get back into work and just keeping up with the everything. As much as I just want you all to myself all day, everything is about balance.
So i guess it's good for me to work on other areas of my life other then you :)
Ill post more later about this month and what your doing. About your first holidays and how spoiled you got by all your family ( especially all your grandparents!!)
So since you have so many new toys to play with today maybe it'll keep you entertained long enough for me to get
Other things done :)
Well my sweet girl- not to sound cheesy but you are, by far the best gift i could ever ask for. I love you with all my heart.
your Mama
your first kiss
he had string cheese in his mouth and you went and took a bite...lady n the tramp (=
many faces of Alex
your fav rag doll "ivy"
getting you ready for the circus

we have the same feet (sorry bout that)

Santas first Delivery

eating your face

with your grandma Mila

Gma and you

Monday, November 19, 2012

7 1/2 months and MAMA it is!

Ok ok so i KNOW i rarely ever proofread what i write, but this last post....... well lets just say i could even follow myself!!!

My mind often works way faster then my fingers can type, therefor my writing can be a bit confusing. Yes! this is why i should proof read! but by the time im done writing im usually to tired or dont get a chance.  so i end up posting it without correcting anything, but to my defense (; im usually blogging from my iphone as im nursing Alex to sleep, So you can imagine its not all that easy. Still no excuse.

So i want to apologize to  anyone that has to decipher my blog and at times re read it, I will try to proofread before posting (=
 ok with that all being said my baby girl is doing new and exciting things!
The most exciting of all is she said her first kinda word.... and it was mama!!!!! haha yep Jeff and i have been battling each other on what or who she will say first.
 I of course have been teaching her to say mama n Jeff has been telling her to say dada.....(sorry babe i won!) butttttttt...... the next day, she did said dada, and its been dadadadadadadad ever since! The only mama i hear has been when i walk away from her, shes tired or hunger.

We are not sure if these "mama" " dada" "baba" are just new noises she is trying out at random or if she can associate mama with me, n dada with jeff and other noises with other things?? The few mama she has said have been oddly right at the same time as she needs me so im kinda leaning towards she might have a little bit of purpose and intent when she babbles.

There have been so many changes this month that I need to start a list, so i dont forget when i sit and write this to you.
 But the biggest and best change is that your starting to be aware of so much & enjoyit all in a way that i have not seen until now.
You really just wanna see and take in as much as you possibly can. Curiosity & happiness  pretty much sums up your whole being!  There hasn’t been a where i wasnt excited to wake up to see your sweet face and get to spend the day with you. Each day, every day.!!
Yes, im tired alot,
Yes i have little time to eat a full meal or take a long shower ( or do anything else for that matter)
Yes ther
e are days where i wanna be lazy n stay in bed and you wont let me
Yes i sometimes day dream about how easy it use to be to just run to the store and now i look like im going on a weekend trip any time i leave the house
Yes Fri and Sat we are usually in bed by midnight when most of our friends our out
Yes i sometimes wish i could grow a third arm or just skip sleeping all together so i had more time for things i want to do, but somehow a single thought about you, your little smiles, giggles, smell, hugs and all your little corks make it all just fine. It makes all that stuff just kinda go away.
I usually only realize those things when you doze off to sleep and i have few free moments or someone watches you for a bit. Then BOOM, reality sets in for a bit, and the voice in my head says you still need to eat,clean,work and rest today so GO.
but dont you worry before i drive my self crazy trying to catch up on all that, you usually interrupt me and then im back to my lala land with you and all the rest gets to wait.
  I am not saying this to be sappy or poetic. I am not either of those. I am saying that because it is true. you bring so much happiness.

Not sure if im repeating myself here but you truly have been the hardest physical and mental job iv ever had, yet by far the most rewarding  and amazing .

You Grandma Connie came to visit for a few days, you guys seemed to connect really well. You dont get to see your dads parents all that much since they live in Oregon but you acted very comfortable with her, she even got you to sleep a bunch of times!! ( you dont ever wanna miss a thing so no one else can get you to sleep except for me and a boob in your mouth) So yes the fact that you felt comfortable enough to fall asleep on her gives me great hope that soon i wont be the only one who has to put you down !! haha ok im kidding  but you def like her.
They come down and visit you as much as they can but for now we will just have to skype with them more so you know who they are.

i made you a Beet Puree
lets just say im glad you outfit was the same color as your food

I really had so much more to tell plus more video and pictures but its once agsin 2am and i know youll be up in a few hours to eat so i must get some sleep in, ill try to post more this week to catch up

Greating Cards